Backbiting: Mentioning an Absent Person in a Way They Dislike

When asked about backbiting, the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:

«ذِكْرُكَ أَخَاكَ بِمَا يَكْرَهُ»

Sahih Muslim 2589, an excerpt. In meaning: mentioning your brother in a way he dislikes. He then explained that if the fault is truly present, it is backbiting; if it is not, it is a false accusation. "But he really is like that" is therefore not an excuse. Ghibah concerns a real fault mentioned without a valid Islamic reason.

It can concern someone's character, appearance, work or household affairs. It is not limited to spoken words: writing, gestures and imitation can also expose a recognisable person's faults to others.

Buhtan: Attributing Something False to Someone

Buhtan is a false accusation that combines lying with an attack on someone's honour. An allegation does not become true because many people repeat it, so do not attribute something to a person without knowing it to be established. Accusations against chastity and sexual honour are especially serious.

Namimah: Carrying Words to Cause Division

Namimah means passing people's words between them to cause hostility and damage relationships, as Ibn 'Uthaymin explained. A tale-bearer may report the words accurately but use them to turn people against one another.

Reporting a genuine threat to someone able to respond, or giving a necessary warning to someone who needs it, is different from passing on private remarks to inflame a quarrel. Calling a disclosure "advice" does not settle its ruling: its truth, necessity and manner still matter.

Backbiting and tale-bearing are prohibited, and Ibn Baz counted them among the major sins. Allah says:

﴿وَلَا يَغْتَبْ بَعْضُكُمْ بَعْضًا أَيُحِبُّ أَحَدُكُمْ أَنْ يَأْكُلَ لَحْمَ أَخِيهِ مَيْتًا فَكَرِهْتُمُوهُ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ إِنَّ اللَّهَ تَوَّابٌ رَحِيمٌ﴾

Quran 49:12, an excerpt. In meaning: do not backbite one another; would anyone wish to eat the flesh of a dead brother? You would abhor it. Fear Allah, who accepts repentance and is merciful.

The verse also prohibits sinful suspicion and spying. Suspicion must not be turned into news to spread, nor should people search for private faults to discuss. Its ending opens the door to repentance rather than leaving someone to despair or continue the wrong.

The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:

«لَا يَدْخُلُ الْجَنَّةَ نَمَّامٌ»

Sahih Muslim 105: a tale-bearer will not enter Paradise. This is a severe warning, not a declaration that everyone who commits the sin has left Islam or will remain in Hell forever. Ibn Baz explained that sinful believers who die upon tawhid without repenting are subject to Allah's will, and will not remain in Hell forever if punished there. Sincere repentance is accepted, with the obligations concerning people's rights also addressed.

In the hadith about the bankrupt person, the Prophet described someone arriving with acts of worship but also wrongs against others. Their claims are settled from that person's good deeds:

«فَيُعْطَى هَذَا مِنْ حَسَنَاتِهِ وَهَذَا مِنْ حَسَنَاتِهِ»

Sahih Muslim 2581, an excerpt. In meaning: one receives some of his good deeds, and another receives some. Prayer and fasting do not permit harming people or make their rights trivial. Nor can anyone claim to know a particular person's balance of deeds or final fate.

Scholars identified circumstances in which disclosure serves a legitimate Islamic need, rather than revenge or entertainment. Say only what the purpose requires, to someone who needs it, truthfully and fairly. These include:

1. Seeking redress: explaining wrongdoing to someone able to protect or help the victim, such as an appropriate authority or a trustworthy person who can assist.
2. Seeking a fatwa: explaining the relevant facts without unnecessarily identifying people or exposing unrelated details.
3. Advice and warning against harm: answering a genuine marriage or business enquiry, or warning an affected person about established fraud, rather than repeating rumours.
4. Seeking help to stop wrongdoing: telling someone able to address it, not turning the matter into public humiliation or aggression.
5. Mentioning misconduct that someone openly displays in the appropriate context, without investigating concealed faults or attacking their family.
6. Necessary identification: using a recognisable description when no adequate alternative is available, without ridicule or contempt.

For example, Hind bint 'Utbah complained to the Prophet about Abu Sufyan's withholding sufficient household support, and he answered her question about her right. Sahih al-Bukhari 5364. This was a request for guidance and help, not a gathering for belittling her husband.

Likewise, complaining about a neighbour's harmful conduct does not permit exposing household secrets or mocking them. Seek an appropriate way to stop the harm. See The Rights of Neighbors in Islam for further guidance.

Repentance begins by stopping the sin, regretting it and sincerely resolving not to return. Do not wait until every damaged relationship is repaired before stopping harmful speech, or use a previous relapse as an excuse to continue. See How to Repent to Allah Sincerely for the conditions of tawbah.

Backbiting also violates another person's rights. Alongside repentance, repair what you can of the harm. The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:

«مَنْ كَانَتْ لَهُ مَظْلَمَةٌ لِأَحَدٍ مِنْ عِرْضِهِ أَوْ شَيْءٍ فَلْيَتَحَلَّلْهُ مِنْهُ الْيَوْمَ»

Sahih al-Bukhari 2449, an excerpt. In meaning: whoever has wronged someone concerning their honour or anything else should seek release from that wrong today. Part of repair is removing harmful posts or recordings you control, asking for reachable copies to be removed, and correcting false claims before those who received them, as far as you can.

If what you said was true but mentioning it was backbiting, do not falsely deny the event. Acknowledge to those who heard it that your disclosure was unjustified, and mention genuine good you know about the person, without inventing praise. If carrying words between two people damaged their relationship, stop carrying them and work to undo the misunderstanding and harm without starting the conflict again.

Ibn Baz distinguished the circumstances. Seek pardon for harm to someone's honour where this can be done without a greater wrong. If disclosure is likely to cause strife, hostility and further harm, or reaching the person is genuinely impossible, repent to Allah, pray for them and seek forgiveness for them, and speak of good qualities you actually know where you previously spoke badly of them.

Someone who has heard what was said and been hurt should be approached with an apology and request for pardon where that is possible without further serious harm. If they have not heard it and telling them would only cause fresh hurt and conflict, confession should not become another injury. The concern here is preventing further harm, not escaping an uncomfortable apology.

Not informing them in that situation does not permit a false accusation to remain in circulation, or cancel money you took or financial loss you caused. Nor does praying for them replace stopping the publication of your harmful words. Where several harms or obligations overlap, seek a knowledgeable scholar's advice without broadcasting the case publicly.

The Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, said:

«فَلْيَقُلْ خَيْرًا أَوْ لِيَصْمُتْ»

Sahih al-Bukhari 6018, an excerpt: speak good or remain silent. Before speaking or forwarding something, ask whether you know it to be true, whether the recipient needs it, and whether the purpose can be achieved without exposing a fault or secret. If there is no sound reason to share it, leave it alone.

In conversation, a gentle interruption may help: "Let's leave him out of this," or a change to a useful subject. If backbiting continues, do not encourage it with laughter or comments. Object as you are able, and leave if you can. Correcting backbiting need not become an attack on the speaker's faith or intentions.

If someone brings words likely to cause hostility, do not rush to believe or circulate them, or spy to investigate every remark. A consequential issue or someone's protection may require checking, but do it proportionately through trustworthy means, not by sending the rumour into more groups.